Break The Cycle – Let It Go!
I’m not a clinical psychologist or psychiatrist, but someone has to say it – when you’re in an unhealthy relationship, let it go!
This article isn’t for everyone. I certainly applaud those of you who are in happy, healthy relationships. It’s not for the couple that just had a disagreement over whether the toilet paper roll should be placed over or under. It is meant to bring attention to those individuals – both male and female – who are caught up in situations that you “know” are not good for you and yet you hang on.
Questions, Questions, Questions
So what should you do? How do you let the relationship go? How do you know that you need to let it go?
Let’s tackle the obvious first – identifying that an unhealthy relationship exist.
Actually, finding the answer is quite simple. We need only to answer one question - - “Does your misery outweigh the happy times that you have together?”
To do this make two columns - - In one column list the things that make you happy in the relationship and the things that make you unhappy in the next column. Compare the two. Does your column filled with misery outweigh your happy column? If it does, it’s time to break the cycle and let it go.
The Breaking Point
What is the breaking point? How far do you go before you think enough of yourself to cut the ties that make you miserable?
All too often, we allow ourselves to be caught up in relationships filled with selfishness and abuse - - the basis of which leads to an unhappy, unhealthy, one-sided affair of the heart. Out of all my years of living, I have been able to develop a few words of wisdom. One of which is – you can’t make anyone love you. No matter what you do, it does not mean that any measure of affection will be returned to you.
What causes us to stay in unhealthy relationships? Why do we hang on? Is it fear of loneliness? Many of us can’t stand to be without someone in our lives - constantly in and out of relationships – it doesn’t matter whether they are meaningful or not – you have to be with someone – anyone.
So what’s the answer? Actually, the answer lies within – you have to first love yourself. Discover who you are and what you want out of life. You have to enjoy being with “you”.
The monumental fact in this whole matter is that very few of us actually give our dating over to God. No, I don’t mean just asking Him to bring us a mate. I mean actually letting Him be in charge of your dating experiences. Trust Him. We all know that God will never make a mess of our lives. Allow Him to work on you and prepare you for the prize that He’s chosen for you. Keep in mind, that while he is preparing you for the man or woman of your dreams, He is also preparing them for you. It may seem as though it is taking forever before you are actually made ready for your mate. But, nevertheless, rest assured that when your time arrives, it will be everlasting and well worth the wait.